Disappointed…

"It is not a disgrace to fail. Failing is one of the greatest arts in the world." ~Charles F. Kettering

"Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly." ~Robert Francis Kennedy

That’s how I feel about my performance at BSLT 70.3. I went there with every intention of grabbing the Kona slot, I was excited and nervous and ready to give it my all! Everyone kept telling me how great I was going to do and by Saturday… maybe even Friday I was so sick of hearing how great my race was going to go from other people that I told a couple of my friends that “the next time I hear how great I am going to do I am going to punch that person in the face!” Great attitude, right? And I am such a hypocrite because I ALWAYS tell people, “You are going to have such a great race!!!” I just wanted to race my race and see what I could throw down. There was NO way I was going to finish this race thinking, “what if?” And you know what, I don’t have any “what ifs” after finishing. I gave the race all I had on that day and I came up short.

Here’s how the race played out…

When I arrived in Lubbock, I met up with my friend Jim who raced IM New Zealand with me. It was great to see him again and catch up… many of us who travelled to NZ with Ken Glah’s Endurance Sports Travel group have kept in touch and plan on racing together again and again.

Jim and I drove to the start of the race together and while we were driving he was Mr. Chatty Cathy. It was SUPER windy out; lightening was in the sky and who knew what the day would bring. He was talking about the wind, his race, my race, how the buildings ahead looked like where Homer Simpson works. You name it he was talking about it. I was giving him all one-word answers to questions he would ask and finally I couldn’t take it anymore so I told him I couldn’t talk anymore. I needed to reflect and get my emotions in check. Once we got to the race I grabbed my stuff and headed to transition on my own. The nice thing about being in the youngest age group is that I generally get racked with the pros. I am no threat to them so they usually chatter away to me. One of them this morning was telling me how she hated the wind, she didn’t care if it rained or was super hot, but she DID NOT like the wind and it was worse than Kona winds. I set up some of my stuff that I figured wouldn’t blow away in the next hour and went for a little stroll. Then I ran into Charisa and her husband. I had never met her in person, so that was great!!! I saw a few other friends of mine, wished them good luck and went back to my bike to figure out how I could place my stuff so it didn’t blow away (it was that windy, but I was really excited about the wind… wind doesn’t bother me one bit, heck I have been caught in dust storms on my bike and survived unscathed – this wasn’t that bad and I was hoping it would scare the other girls in my AG). When I did I saw my friend Patrick Bless arrive. He turned pro last year and when I did this race in 2007 he and I drove out and raced together. I figured maybe I would get the Kona slot again since he was here (he could be my good luck charm). You see I did this race in 2007, it was my first 70.3 and I came in 3rd in my AG. The Kona slot rolled down to me, but I was not ready for IM yet and turned it down for a Clearwater slot. I still don’t regret my decision to turn Kona down that first time.
This is turning out to be very LONG... SORRY… I will try to keep it shorter!

Swim:

My wave left 35 minutes after the men’s pro wave. We lined up on the beach and I was nervous, scared, on the verge of tears, but when they yelled, “GO!” I ran into the lake and a sense of calm took over. The first 400m were brutal, I couldn’t believe how rough these ladies were, but it didn’t phase me (this was the good part of my good, bad and ugly race). Each race I become more comfortable in the open water. My sighting gets better, my stroke becomes smoother, I don’t get rattled as easily and dare I say it… I actually kind of enjoy the swim now ☺.

Bike:

Jen and I talked about how I would ride the bike course. Usually I like to ride the bike as hard as I can, I like passing people and never looking back. I love blowing by people on the bike, especially riding up hills. But since Buffalo Springs is generally very hot and humid we decided I should take it easy, keep my HR in check, spin up the hills and not hammer so I can run off the bike. I followed Jen’s plan and I was bored out of my mind! I was still passing people, but I wasn’t happy sitting up and spinning up the hills, plus it was rainy and wet and I just wanted to get this ride over with. Around mile 20 my tire repair bottle flew out of its rear holder… oops! As soon as that happened I knew I better get through the bottle of Infinit I had on my frame and trade it out with the full one on my rear cage so I don’t lose the rest of my nutrition too. Not long after I switched my bottles, my empty bottle flew out the back and into the road – SMART me ☺ I had switched them just in time! I was also lucky that I didn’t suffer any flats!

Run:

The last 16 miles of the bike I began to dread the run. This is NOT like me; I usually look forward to the run, even with all my stomach cramping issues. Unfortunately today I just didn’t feel any spunk, but I wasn’t going to let that get me down. Once off the bike I stuck my wet socks and wet shoes on (they were out in the rain) and headed out of transition. I ran side by side with this guy for the first 4 miles and at one point he tried to talk to me, but I was concentrating on putting one foot in front of the other that I couldn’t respond back. I just had nothing in my legs. I couldn’t let that get me down mentally, I was still first in my AG and second already had a Kona slot, so all I had to do was hang on to her if she tried to pass me and hopefully we could bring it in one and two together. At mile 4 she passed me and I couldn’t react. At mile 6 another girl in my AG passed me and she was running like a freakin’ gazelle – she eventually took first and Kona! At mile 10 another girl in my AG passed me! I came in 4th – no Kona for me.

The last mile I experienced something many of you I am sure have, but it was a first for me. All the sudden my right calf cramped, then my left calf, then my left quad, then my right hamstring and I had this continuous flicker of cramping through my legs. The only thing I can compare it to is twinkling Xmas lights in my legs. I was trying SOOO hard to keep myself from falling down as I made my way through the last mile, I could picture Chris Legh at Kona collapsing about 50 meters from the finish line. Although I wasn’t that bad, however when I crossed the line I was white as a ghost (at least that’s what they told me), they asked me if I wanted an IV and I will never turn down an IV so they helped me into the med tent and put me in a lawn chair and hooked me up to an IV. The kid who shoved the needle in my arm got my blood all over him, but after that race I couldn’t feel a damn thing. He could’ve poked me a hundred more times and I wouldn’t know the difference.
So much more happened during this race, but I could probably write a book and no one need’s to read that much about me.

I raced BSLT 70.3 for a few reasons, but the main one being Kona. I didn’t come home with the golden ticket and I am disappointed.

HOWEVER…

I learned MORE from this race than I ever expected. Each time I race I learn, but BSLT taught me so much, I wouldn’t trade my experience this past weekend for anything else. I LOVE this sport and I know that more than ever right now. Just like passing people on the bike fuels my fire, so does learning great lessons ☺ I will save the lesson’s I learned for another blog post.

And one last little quote that is so simple, yet means so much...

“If at first you don't succeed, try, try again.”

IM Canada here I come!

BUSY!

This weekend was SUPER busy. Between dog sitting, workouts, working, friends, packing for my race this weekend, father's day and playing with Cody I almost didn't make it out alive! WOOHEE

On Sunday I woke up bright and early to meet my friends Marc and Brian for a run at Pinnacle Peak (I missed my picture op here). The run ends on the backside of Pinnacle Peak which we normally run, but today since Marc and I are tapering we walked the last 2 miles. I talked the guys into an open water swim at Bartlett Lake after the run, but Marc was having doubts about going since he was tired. I promised him a frosty drink from the gas station before we headed to the lake. Once we got to the gas station he stood by the frosty machine for a solid 5 minutes drinking and refilling his cup! The clerk thought he was crazy :-)

At the lake we had a nice swim.... Below is a picture of us post swim. I am wearing the shirt I ran in and got called out for sniffing it to see just how nasty it was, but I forgot a clean sports bra, so you do what you gotta do.

After the swim I hurried back home, showered and got into my dad's truck that he let me drive when I crashed my car back in March. The paint on the hood of the truck needed to be repainted so its been in the shop and was finally finished on Friday. So I promised my dad I would drive it back up to Flagstaff where it belongs, but I was running over an hour late - OOPS! I drove the 2hr drive up North, parked it at the airport where my dad picked my up in his plane and we flew back down to the valley.

He wanted me to get up north earlier because it gets windy in the afternoon. As we were flying home he told me I may need to hold on to my seat because its going to be a bumpy one! Fortunately I don't have a weak stomach when it comes to stuff like that. Here is a shot of Sedona - pretty, eh?

Once we got back into town we had plans with my brother to go see The Hangover and dinner (sushi). The movie was hilarious!!!

I was checking in on IMCDA friends throughout the day!!! Everyone ROCKED IT!!!! I am very impressed and thrilled for everyone :-)

Early Thursday morning I am leaving for Texas. I am meeting up with my friend Jim who raced IM New Zealand with me. We are racing Buffalo Springs 70.3 and I am already getting nervous - especially after seeing how awesome everyone did in CDA!!!

Jim already warned me that I can't make fun of him for the atrocious amount of Hammer products he packed!

awake

I had a rough weekend of training, a migraine that fades into a headache at times and in turn have given up coffee for the summer. It all started a couple weeks ago, the day after Deuces Wild Triathlon to be exact. Since then I haven’t felt great, not sick or anything, just a bit blah. I am sure some of this is mental as I am trying to figure out my issues during racing (i.e. the stomach cramps/side stitches) and wanting to get on the right path. Although I think I am on the “right” path, it just takes time to figure these things out, but I am certain I will get there sooner or later. Then about a 1.5 weeks ago I got my notorious summer migraine! I am SO used to them, I just never know when it’s going to start. Each summer that I have stayed in Scottsdale, since my teenage years, I have endured a summer of migraines and headaches. Some days are worse than others. As soon as the migraines arrive I give up coffee and that seems to help. Except its been tough without the caffeine boost in the morning and getting up early and still having the lingering migraine which has turned into a dull headache - UGH. This morning I am proud (or maybe not so much since I should have been getting up at least 3 x week) to say that I actually got up when my alarm went off at 4:15am to go to masters swim. While I was in the kitchen this morning filling my water bottles and packing my breakie I just starred at the coffee pot longing for a cup of joe. ☹ What makes it all worthwhile is being able to swim Long Course Meters in the morning now!!! How can you not get excited for LCM at 4:15 in the morning?!?

I must mention that I am SO SO SO excited to e-spectate this weekend as many of my friends will be racing IMCDA!!! WOO HOO IRONMAN ;-)

10 days

I can't believe it’s been THAT long since I have updated my blog! Life has been busy. You know its crazy when you haven't checked out Facebook (heaven forbid) in 72 hours or updated your blog in 10 days or even Trainingpeaks for that matter since Monday.

Yesterday I made my friend Jordan do my 45-minute easy run with me. We run a similar route most times we run together and he proceeded to tell me this time that the 2 mile incline was just TOO much of a hill for him now- I laughed and told him I would drop him like a bad habit next time he said that to me ( I am a lovely friend). He recovered from that quickly (he is used to it by now) and we just got back into a nice conversation when he saw a SNAKE. That boy ran so fast screaming like a little girl I had to stop running to keep from peeing in my pants! I was standing there right next to the snake laughing as he was yelling at me to "HURRY UP, HURRY UP, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!? IT’S GOING TO EAT YOU!!!" What is scary is Jordan was serious – it was just a little bull snake. Oh yeah and did I mention this was an out and back run we, so we had to turn around after he calmed down and head back past the SNAKE. Jordan couldn't figure out which side of the road was safer to run on because now that he saw one snake there could be more lurking in the brush.

While we were running back near where we saw the snake and Jordan was getting his panties in a twist, I saw a truly horrifying thing. A big man in LITTLE shorts. I wanted to pull out a stick of bodyglide and give it to him as his thighs were rubbing together I swear sparks were flying out of his shorts. The man must have needed XL MEN's shorts and was wearing what I imagine a M WOMEN's split shorts. WOOHEE that was more than my eyes could handle!!!

On to the training front all things are looking good. I am on to something as far as my side stitches during races are going. I just need another race before my next big one to try out my theory. But looks like my next big one is going to be the test pilot - oh well, I have plenty of racing years left to get things right.

I haven't mentioned work in a while on my blog, but I am happy to say that things seem to be moving in the right direction. I still don't know what I want to do with my life, but I don't think it’s reasonable to believe I should know. They (my bosses) are using me as a guinea pig and allowing me to show them what I can do. So far I have gotten rave reviews and I feel as though there is SOO SOO much more to be done.

Speaking of work… I should get back to it!

Learning.

This past weekend I competed in the Deuces Wild Olympic distance triathlon in Show Low, AZ. Show Low was named after a poker game between C.E. Cooley and Marion Clark (hence “Deuces Wild”), located in central eastern Arizona and has an elevation of 6400ft. It was great to get out of the heat for the weekend. When we got to packet pick-up it was raining, windy and COLD! The beanie, jacket and gloves had to come out of hibernation for this race.

After Maureen and I checked in we decided it was too ugly out to ride our bikes, but we needed to move our legs so we changed into our run gear and set out on the race route. We followed the racecourse, but it got a bit confusing at one point and we ran a little longer than planned. Once we got back to packet pick-up the boys had arrived. BH, OC, Stocker and Korey were hungry for dinner… it was 4:30pm. Maureen and I decided we could eat so we all headed to dinner. You might as well have added 40 years onto our ages as we beat the early-early birds! After dinner we went back to our hotel and checked in, BH and Korey were just across the hall from us. They thought it would be funny to stick a copy of OC’s swimsuit modeling pic on our door… here is the pic that we never took down on our door for us when we got to our room.

We spent the evening watching TV, getting things organized for race morning and went to sleep early. Except I couldn’t sleep and that is VERY unlike me. Seriously, I ALWAYS sleep like a baby the night before races. The altitude was getting to me though and I never felt like I could fully breath. Altitude beats me up pretty good, I wish it didn’t and I like to forget the toll it takes on me, but I suffer the first week at altitude – its just the way it is.

Morning couldn’t come soon enough and Maureen’s alarm went off at 4am. I was up and moving, my race gear + 5 extra layers was on before she even got out of bed. Once she was ready and I had made my breakie we headed to the race site. She was doing the half IM and her race began at 6:30am. I got to watch the half IMer’s swim before I even had to warm-up. At 7:20 I stripped off a few layers, threw my running shoes on and headed out along the course for a little warm-up. I actually felt pretty good, fairly speedy and I was looking forward to the run ☺ After my run I squeezed into my wetsuit and got into the 61 degree water – it wasn’t bad at all! I swam around for 10 minutes trying to get used to the water and calm myself down.

Swim:

Open water swimming is hard for me. I need a good warm-up before I start or I freak out for a bit and that costs me time, so I try my best to get it out of the way before the gun goes off ☺ I am trying to put myself out there during races, give myself a chance to get on some fast feet and hold on as best I can during the swim. So I position myself in the front, or pretty close to the front. This hasn’t worked out too well for me yet because I am not fast enough - YET, but I have to give myself the opportunity and try, or it will never happen. The swim went smoothly, I am not fast, but I am becoming more comfortable in the water… so it’s a step in the right direction!

Bike:

The bike seems to be my strongest in triathlon. I like riding hills and I don’t like getting passed, so I ride hard. But I was NOT into the bike today. I just wanted to test my run and I started daydreaming about my run while on the bike. I kept reminding myself what my friend Angi told me, “Remember to push on the middle part of the bike, it is always super windy there...but that is where peoples "minds" are weak, so stay strong on that!!!” and all I could think was, “DAMN YOU ANGI!!!” There were more expletives filling my mind during the ride, especially when the 55-year-old woman passed me and then proceeded to stand-up and stop pedaling! At mile 15 there was even more bad language as I was pedaling up this long hill and my tummy began to cramp – NO NO NO NO NOOOO!!!!!!! THIS IS RIDICULOUS, WTF!!!!!!!! I was out of my aerobars climbing, but once I was back down it went away. I pushed through the last 10 miles of the bike, made it through to transition and was happy to be running.

Run:

I knew that since my tummy cramped already on the bike that I better start the run slow. I jogged along try to breath deep and stop the cramp from getting worse, but it was useless. That STUPID BUGGER took over and I could. Not. Get. Rid. Of. It!!!!! At one point I had to walk and was putting as much pressure on my ribs as I could with my hands and a guy told me to breath as deeply as I could through my nose and fill my lungs as much as I could, then breath out through my mouth. I laughed! We were at 6400ft and he wanted me to fill my lungs?!? HA HA HA! But I tried… Anything to fix this dagger in my ribs. It was no use today and I jogged/shuffled the rest of the run. I was pissed off when I crossed the finish line. I was even pissed at the guy who told me at mile 5 that I was “holding such a great, consistent pace!” I was nice and said “thanks” but the truth is that it wasn’t even marathon pace for me… UGH!!! No, make that DOUBLE UGH!!!

I do these “little” races to work out these kinks in my racing. So I can’t be mad about this race, its helped Jen and I get to the root of my problem. My training is going GREAT – now we just need to get my racing issues all figured out! I am on my way, it’s a frustrating path, but no one said it wouldn’t be.

Here are some pics...

Maureen getting ready to rock her race!

OC coming out of the water

BH coming out of the water

Me on my ride in Show Low the day after the race :-)